Chicken names

I have learned a few things along the way when it comes to naming my chickens. For example, I recently learned that I should avoid any racy sounding names unless I want a lot of Google hits on my blog from Europe and Morocco. Apparently, "voluptuous Dolly Parton" is an oft requested search. Much to their dismay, the web surfers are offered my story of the large breasted blonde hen who turned out to be a rooster. I have also learned that if a chicken is named after food, he or she will certainly come to an untimely death. I don't know how it happens, but it is an automatic jinx. We have lost Snickers, Godiva, Hershey, and most recently Dumpling. The only chicken to avoid this fate is Milky Way. I have put it out there for the fates that he is named after the constellation reflected in his beautiful black and white flecked feathers and not for the nougaty candy bar! On a positive note, chickens named after loved ones have taken on their personality traits as well, whether it be as mother, protector, or clown. Take care or else I may be naming one after you!!!

New duchesses arrive at the Palais des Poulets

Our 4th generation of hens has been moved from the nursery into the Palais des Poulets. They were greeted by Sallie, the Rhodie, and Priscilla, the Dominique, who represented the Ladies Auxiliary. After a tour of their new home, Sallie and Priscilla treated the girls to a welcome luncheon featuring raisins, baguettes, and cheese. A fine time was had by all. The new court at the Palais has enjoyed exploring the great outdoors and playing chase with Milky Way and the other roosters even though I keep telling them that they are much too young to date.

Counting chickens

I know you all have been told at some point or another "Don't count your chickens before they hatch". It's a great expression. I literally have made plans for eggs in a nest that ended up not hatching. The result of which was going to the Crump flea market to try my luck buying baby chicks from a man in overalls and no teeth who swore they were all girls. That was a hard lesson as I ended up with 3, count em, 3 roosters. That is 3 too many for someone in the egg selling business. Especially when I already have a well established Cuckoo Maran rooster named Milky Way who doesn't need any help with the ladies. Well, now I have added another expression to my repertoire. Don't name your chicken before puberty. It happens to me with every new generation of chicks. You may remember the plucky big breasted blonde we named Dolly Parton. Well, Dolly ended up turning into a really mean rooster we renamed Uncle Swep after one of Jay's great uncles. Now, we are in another predicament as our precocious blonde Buff Orpington chick Lindsey Lohan has recently been heard attempting to crow.

Someone or something is taking our eggs. We are finding lots of egg yolks and bits of egg shell in the nesting boxes. The culprit is especially fond of the white eggs. Our neighbors seem to think it is a snake. Yikes!

Dolly Parton no more...

We have finally identified our free "exotic" chick that the good people at Murray McMurray hatchery threw in. The bad news is that it is Dolly Parton, our voluptuous, big breasted blonde. The good news is that SHE is a HE and he is an Ameraucana chicken that will enable us to have some purebred chicks eventually. These are the chickens that Martha Stewart turned me on to that lay the green and blue eggs. They are originally from a line of jungle fowl from South America. They are our customers' favorites!

For the record, his name is now Uncle Swep. He is named for Jay's Great Uncle who was a large man with even larger feathery eyebrows. He is trying to crow but is still sounding more like Peter Brady hitting puberty than a manly man.

The Palais des Poulets' New Court

The Royal Court of the Palais des Poulets officially doubled on February 9th when 2 day old chicks arrived. We ordered 10 Ameraucana chicks (the blue/green/pink layers), 10 Buff Orpington chicks (voluptuous strawberry blondes like yours truly), and 5 Brown Leghorns (plus a free fancy breed we have yet to determine).

We have also started an Adopt a Chick program with our current egg clients. They get naming rights to the chick of their choice. We have taken the liberty of naming some ourselves based upon their outstanding personalities. Below is a line up of some chicks who have already made names for themselves.

Lola, the Showgirl
Dolly Parton, the big breasted blonde

Patricia, the Bully (she is very jealous of Dolly especially although they are almost identical)

Chick Norris, the Peacemaker (she puts the beat down on Patricia several times a day when she starts acting bitchy)

Catfish, the Gasper (poor Catfish went through a bout of hiccups for several days. Jay said she looked like a catfish gasping for air.)

Sponsored chicks: JennyVergos, Dabney Millar, and HENrietta Brown. There are still 16 working girls for "hire".

Here's What You've Been Missing at Bent Willow

Well now that the new year is upon us, I thought I would take time to reflect on what has happened at Bent Willow Ranch since my last post in July '08 (lazy, lazy me).

CHICKENS: We had lots of success with the chickens. In fact, by the end of the summer, we were up to 20 eggs a day! We lost three girls, Iris, Fern and Dom Perignon, to heat. The remaining girls stood up to the heat, ate lots of bugs picked out of the garden and helped us create quite a nice little niche in the Free-range egg business. We are now an officially licensed egg producer and just got a 100 from the Health Dept. last month! My OCD is paying off!!!

Winter came and the girls began to molt and stop egg production. I told everyone that they had sent their feathers off to Land's End to try out as Covergirls in the Down Comforter issue.

Now that the days are getting a little longer, they are beginning to amp up egg production again. Martha beware, we are gaining ground!!!

GARDEN: Our garden made several bushels of beans and okra and a few tomatoes and melons. We relied on our neighbors for the rest. We had bushels of apples from our apple tree and even some wild cherries that we made into flavored vodka.

HUNTING: Jay, the boys and friends killed about 150 doves, 9 does and 5 bucks this year.

CABIN: We got a nice new green steel roof for Christmas. It officially makes the house look like a Lincoln Log Cabin.